Online Chat for the X-men
by ParisaZarisa
Summary: Online group chat for the X-men. And a few of their friends. Maybe some enemies. Frenemies? Basically everyone.
1. Chapter 1

Online group chat for the mansion:

 _Sunday, Nov 9, 3:24 pm_

 **Shadowcat** : Heyyyyyyy people!

 **RogueBludger** : Kitty

 **RogueBludger** : Using your code name as your screen name?

 **RogueBludger** : Rookie mistake

 **Shadowcat** : Rogue…

 **Shadowcat** : _Bludger_? Is that like, a Harry Potter reference?

 **Shadowcat** : (ew)

 **RogueBludger** : Woman, how dare you insult the great and noble sport of Quidditch

 **Shadowcat** : I'm not insulting the fictional sport of quidditch

 **Shadowcat** : (I'm insulting you)

 **RogueBludger** : You got something to say to me?

 **RogueBludger** : SAY IT TO MY FACE

 **Shadowcat** : I do, I do got something to type to you (you witch with a bee)

 **RogueBludger** : Take it out of the parenthesis, I dare you

 **RogueBludger** : You don't have the ball

 **Shadowcat** : I do have the ball, I have plural balls. I have pairs of balls and they're all symmetrical. (Unlike your face)

 **RogueBludger** : I only need one ball to bludgeon you

 **Shadowcat** : Which one do you want?

 **RogueBludger** : I want the one from last week

 **RogueBludger** : When your **cat reflexes** failed you

 _Shadowcat is typing…_

 **RogueBludger** : I want it to still have your blood on it

 **Shadowcat** : That ball doesn't exist. It's ok, I understand your mistake. At the time it seemed like that ball broke my nose but actually my nose triumphed over the ball in a feat of brute strength.

 **RogueBludger** : I made no mistake.

 **RogueBludger** : I was there, I saw it happen

 **Shadowcat** : Your eyes were deceiving you

 **RogueBludger** : Don't lie. I know the truth

 **Shadowcat** : You know nothing

 **RogueBludger** : I know everything because I WAS THE ONE WHO THREW THE BALL

 **Shadowcat** : (gasps and clutches at heart) YOU? NO! NOOOOOO!

 **RogueBludger** : MWAH HAHAHA, INDEED, 'TWAS I WHO BETRAYED YOU

 **RogueBludger** : With my bludger, ah ha ha

 **Shadowcat** : I TRUSTED YOU, TO WARN ME BEFORE THROWING!

 **RogueBludger** : You trusted WRONGLY mwah ha ha

 **Shadowcat** : Compensate my therapy sessions!

 **Shadowcat** : I'm a victim of circumstance!

 _ **NiceAssIce**_ _has entered the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 3:32pm_

 **Shadowcat** : Omg, Rogue, lol. Her face when you were like, "Um, do you mind? Some of us are trying to work here"

 **RogueBludger** : Miss Popular keeps hissing at me and now decides to stand over me?

 **RogueBludger** : Challenge accepted. Also I tried to say that the way you would.

 **Shadowcat** : I liked the execution. And she's been glaring at us for a while anyway.

 **RogueBludger** : What's she even hoping to accomplish with this amateur harassment?

 **Shadowcat** : Idk, I've just been ignoring it.

 **RogueBludger** : Good plan.

 **Shadowcat** : That'll be 10 dollars.

 **RogueBludger** : The Just-Ignore-It plan isn't trademarked

 **Shadowcat** : It's intellectual property

 **RogueBludger** : No it's CULTURE AND SOCIETY

 **Jubilicious** : Rogue, you were the one who broke Kitty's nose?

 **RogueBludger** : No it was Bobby

 **RogueBludger** : They were playing baseball

 **Shadowcat** : WE ALL SAW IT HAPPEN PEOPLE, OK?

 **RogueBludger** : Kitty's a little sensitive about this subject

 **Jubilicious** : Why didn't you phase through it?

 **Shadowcat** : Hey it was very quick and shocking!

 _ **MissPopular**_ _has entered the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 3:36 pm_

 **MissPopular** : Kitty and Rogue – this is quiet homework time. If you can't act appropriately then leave the library.

 **RogueBludger** : I see you liked my idea for your screen name, Jean

 **MissPopular** : Stop looking at each other and snickering!

 **NiceAssIce** :… ummm

 **NiceAssIce** : You guys are in the same room and IM-ing each other?

 **Jubilicious** : lol

 **Shadowcat** : Bobby, what a completely tasteless screen name

 **NiceAssIce** : Hey, jubilee's is Jubilicious!

 **Jubilicious** : Cuz she's delicious!

 **Shadowcat** : See? Not tasteless at all, in fact, Jubilee's sn implies that she is quite the opposite. Asshole.

 **Jubilicious** : Ha!

 **Shadowcat** : Rogue, what is your professional opinion?

 **RogueBludger** : Very low score on the Rogue Screen Name Assessment. In comparison with Jubilicious, which alludes to a sense of taste and enjoyment, and even with the lack of anonymity by including part of her name taken into account, NiceAssIce falls devastatingly below hers on any scale simply because everyone already thinks Bobby is an ass and any attempt of his to own the label is doomed to fail because he doesn't even understand why he is an ass. It's pathetic, really.

 **Shadowca** t: Thank you, Rogue, for that expert assessment.

 **Jubilicious** : I concur.

 **MissPopular** : If you two are not doing homework then you need to leave the library so others can concentrate.

 **RogueBludger** : Hey! I'm writing my paper on _The Count of Monte Cristo_!

 **Shadowcat** : I'm doing my computer science project!

 **MissPopular** : Other people in this room have work to do too, and you two have been giggling to yourselves for basically the whole time you've been here.

 **Shadowcat** : Whoa, that is totally an exaggeration!

 **RogueBludger** : Jean, if you're so disturbed you have a whole room all to yourself that you can go into and be alone. Unlike those of us who have roommates.

 **Shadowcat** : We haven't been preventing anyone else from doing their work! THE ONLY OTHER PERSON HERE IS YOU

 **RogueBludger** : …actually, Kitty

 **MissPopular** : Your roommates are EACH OTHER! And Sam, Amara and Ray are right over there.

 **Shadowcat** : …Oh

 **Shadowcat** : Well, they don't look disturbed at all.

 **MoltenLava** : We're not disturbed.

 **MoltenLava** : I didn't even notice anything was happening until Jean went over and spoke to Rogue.

 **RogueBludger** : Ha! It's all in your head, Miss Perfect. Stop targeting us.

 **MissPopular** : um, it's MissPOPULAR, Rogue

 **Shadowcat** : Jean, we can't all be perfect

 **RogueBludger** : But Kitty, some of us are more perfect than others.

 **MissPopular** : I'm not asking for perfection

 **RogueBludger** : All I want is the chance to perfect this essay

 **Shadowcat** : I want this computer program to work perfectly

 **Golden_Drop_of_Sun** : Actually, Jean, I too am in the library.

 **MissPopular** : …Ok, Roberto.

 **MoltenLava** : No, he's not

 **Crispy** : No, you're not

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : Yes, I am

 **Crispy** : I don't see you anywhere in this room

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : I've been online the whole time.

 **RogueBludger** :…..

 **Shadowcat** : We are talking about an actual room, not a virtual one.

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : I am too.

 **RogueBludger** : He's not in here guys, stop looking around

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : Yes I am!

 **Crispy** : I've been here for at least two hours, he's never been here in that time

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : I've been here for longer

 **Crispy** : I've been here all day

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : I woke up here this morning

 **Crispy** : I fell asleep here last night

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : I've been here since yesterday

 **NiceAssIce** : I was BORN AND RAISED IN THIS ROOM

 **CannonballZ** : I was in this room before it even existed, IT WAS BUILT AROUND ME

 **RogueBludger** : I can't tell if this has escalated or devolved.

 **Shadowcat** : Maybe it's done both at once

 **MoltenLava** : one of you is not even here

 **NiceAssIce** : I am present in spirit

 **MoltenLava** : Not you

 **MoltenLava** : Although you're not here either

 **RogueBludger** : Where did Miss Perfect go?

 **Shadowcat** : I guess she left….

 **RogueBludger** : …has she gone to fetch reinforcements?

 **Shadowcat** : Did anyone see her leave?

 **MoltenLava** : …

 **Crispy** : …

 **CannonballZ** : ….

 **NiceAssIce** : …..

 **MoltenLava** : … no

 **Golden_Drop_Of_Sun** : I didn't see her leave either. I was looking at my computer screen.

 **Crispy** : YOU ARE NOT EVEN HERE!

 _ **BlueNFuzzy**_ _has entered the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 4:06 pm_

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Yo my online brothers and sisters

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Can someone bring me toilet paper, please? I'm in the second floor bathroom!

 **NiceAssIce** : Kurt, get it yourself

 **BlueNFuzzy** : No, I can't

 **RogueBludger** : just apparate

 **BlueNFuzzy** : I can't, I'M OCCUPIED. SOMEONE HELP ME

 **RogueBludger** : Ew, Kurt.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Shut up. Just help me.

 **Shadowcat** : Kurt, you're the last person I ever thought would need something like this.

 **Crispy** : Kurt man, you didn't check before?

 **MoltenLava** : So Kurt, you brought a laptop into the bathroom with you?

 **BlueNFuzzy** : SOMEONE JUST TAKE PITY ON ME PLEASE

 **RogueBludger** : I think Shadowcat is uniquely suited to deal with this kind of mission

 **Shadowcat** : No way, you're his sister, you go

 _ **BeamMeUpScotty**_ _has entered the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 4:10 pm_

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Hey guys

 **BlueNFuzzy** : SCOTT!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Alright, I got you, Kurt

 **BlueNFuzzy** : thanks man!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : I'm close by anyway. Brb.

 **Shadowcat** : Team leader to the rescue!

 **RogueBludger** : Ha! It's like "Scott" isn't actually his name, it's a reference to the kind of toilet paper he will bring you. Like the muffin man? The Scott man.

 **Kitty** : Did that come from one of the voices in your head?

 **RogueBludger** : No, it was completely mine. 100% me. Unvarnished. Unexplained. And clearly unappreciated, you lowly cretins.

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Back

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Thanks for beaming me up some Scott ™, Scott! (I gotchu sis)

 **CannonballZ** : Such man. Much reliable.

 **MoltenLava** : Wow. So leader. Very team.

 **Crispy** : Such amaze. Much justice.

 **NiceAssIce** : Why are you guys talking like that?

 **CannonballZ** : Such wow. Much ignorant.

 **Shadowcat** : Such doge

 **MoltenLava** : 10/10

 **NiceAssIce** : Just answer the question

 **MoltenLava** : Roses are red.

 **MoltenLava** : My name is not Dave

 **MoltenLava** : This makes no sense,

 **RogueBludger** : Microwave

 **CannonballZ** : Much wow. Such rogue. 10/10, So skilled.

 **NiceAssIce** : Ok I'm laughing but I still don't get it

 **Shadowcat** : Much hilarious.

 **CannonballZ** : Such witty.

 **MoltenLava** : So wow

 **RogueBludger** : Very fabulous

 **Shadowcat** : Indie level: 100

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Such glamour

 **CannonballZ** : So hip

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Such class

 **NiceAssIce** : EVEN SCOTT?!

 **NiceAssIce** : WHAT DOES EVERYONE KNOW ABOUT BUT ME

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : So mean. Much rude. Such sad.

 **MoltenLava** : So mystery. Such unsure.

 **NiceAssIce** : STOP IT

 **CannonballZ** : Very disagreement

 **BlueNFuzzy** : How pronounce. Who am i.

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Much infinity

 **NiceAssIce** : I'm done.

 **Shadowcat** : Wow. Such done.

 **MoltenLava** : So ending

 **CannonballZ** : Much over

 _ **NiceAssIce**_ _has left the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 4:55 pm_

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Such gone

 **MissPopular** : Scott.

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Such popular!

 **CannonballZ** : Much natural red

 **MissPopular** : Scott, aren't you supposed to be making dinner tonight?

 **MoltenLava** : Such duty

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : So soon. Such early.

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Much time

 **Crispy** : Such procrastinate

 **MissPopular** : Scott, you don't have as much time as you think you do.

 **MoltenLava** : What's for dinner tonight?

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : We are having a Donnor Party.

 **MoltenLava** : what's that?

 **RogueBludger** : it's cannibalism

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Yum! My favorite!

 **Crispy** : I thought Scott was cooking, not Kitty

 **RogueBludger** : lol

 **Shadowcat** : Are you comparing my exquisite culinary skills to cannibalism?

 **Crispy** : Not at all. I'm saying that when you cook, cannibalism is what we are all gonna resort to, anyway

 **RogueBludger** : If only she had more meat on her, we could kill two birds with one stone…

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Two tasty little birds…..

 **MoltenLava** : This conversation has gotten weird.

 **CannonballZ** : It would be funny though – after, when we talked about how we had eaten Kitty, no one would know we were talking about a person. They would just assume we had eaten a cat.

 **Shadowcat** : HEY! I OBJECT!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : And on that note, goodbye

 _ **BeamMeUpScotty**_ _has left the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 5:14 pm_

 **Shadowcat** : I'm very offended right now.

 **MissPopular** : Don't worry, Kitty. They wouldn't be able to get enough meat off you to serve everyone anyway.

 **Shadowcat** : That totally doesn't make me feel better, Miss Popular

 **RogueBludger** : Yeah. We should cook the Blob first, if we do have a Donnor Party, because not only would we have a _ton_ (literally) of meat, we would have taken out the biggest consumer, too.

 **MissPopular** : You've thought a lot about this, Rogue.

 **Crispy** : … Yeah. A lot….

 **RogueBludger** : It's not me, it's the voices!

 **CannonballZ** : Sure it is, Rogue. Sure it is.

 **Shadowcat** : Whatever. I'd totally be more open to eating Fred Dukes instead of being eaten.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : You know, with just the right amount of nudging, this conversation could get real sexual, real fast.

 **MissPopular** : No nudging!

 **Shadowcat** : NO! NONONO

 **Crispy** : Challenge accepted

 **Shadowcat** : AHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOO

 **RogueBludger** : Ha hahaha, yess

 **Shadowcat** : NO ROGUE NO! Bad Kurt! BAD!

 **CannonballZ** : I just wanna say, the thought of Fred Dukes does not make my mouth water

 **Shadowcat** : Jean, make it stop!

 **MissPopular** : Hmm. That is actually a great point, Sam. I agree.

 **Crispy** : Being the heterosexual male I am, females are just more appetizing.

 **RogueBludger** : You know, I've just remembered this but Fred is actually a really great cook.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Damn, we can't waste talent like that!

 **RogueBludger** : Exactly! Some people make better meals as food and some people simply make better food

 **CannonballZ** : Fish are friends, not food

 _ **NiceAssIce**_ _has reentered that chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 5: 27 pm_

 **NiceAssIce** : DESSERT FOOD, that is.. (not the fish, idk what he's talking about)

 **NiceAssIce** : That's right, I'M BACK! And clearly you people need my help with the sexual innuendos here

 **Shadowcat** : oh dear god

 **RogueBludger** : we were fine without you actually

 **NiceAssIce** : Kitty, I wouldn't mind snacking on you, as a little appetizer

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Ok, I feel like I've opened Pandora's box.

 **NiceAssIce** : But we all know you'd want the Iceman as the main savory popsicle.

 **RogueBludger** : Oh my god, get him away from the computer!

 **CannonballZ** : Whoa.

 **NiceAssIce** : Free licks for everyone!

 **MoltenLava** : He went there.

 **MissPopular** : Bobby, I know you have no control but you should at least try

 **NiceAssIce** : You're just worried I'll be more popular than you, Jean, once people have a taste of the Iceman's ice cream

 **Shadowcat** : Just kill me now, I don't care what happens to my body, as long as my mind is preserved

 **BlueNFuzzy** : I regret so much.

 **MissPopular** : Bobby, I have never been less worried about you challenging my popularity.

 **RogueBludger** : Do you think the Iceman's body would preserve well after we killed him?

 **NiceAssIce** : I'd melt for you, hot mama

 **Crispy** : He has no sense of self-preservation, does he?

 **MoltenLava** : Lolololol

 **CannonballZ** : Is that… do I spot….…..a pun, in the distance?

 **BlueNFuzzy** : It was like lightning, but I think so!

 **MissPopular** : haha, lightning

 **RogueBludger** : Bobby, I see the computer has made you bold. Get off right now or I will make your worst nightmares become a living reality.

 **NiceAssIce** : It's not the computer, I'm always this cool!

 **RogueBludger** : I will make sure you remain a virgin forever.

 **Crispy** : Oh damn

 **CannonballZ** : Shit got real

 **MissPopular** : Everyone can access this chat, guys! Keep it PG and no swearing!

 **RogueBludger** : "Virgin" isn't a swear word

 **Crispy** : Might as well be, for Bobby.

 **MissPopular** : Also, Scott says dinner is going to be ready soon.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : YES I'M STARVING

 _ **BlueNFuzzy**_ _has left the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 5:40 pm_

 **Shadowcat** : Rogue, stop copying me. It was my idea to start packing up.

 **RogueBludger** : wow, so catty. Stop following me back to my room very night, you damn cat!

 **Shadowcat** : um, excuse me, it's my room and you are following me.

 **Shadowcat** : Only people who worship me can follow me.

 **RogueBludger** : So no one then

 **Shadowcat** : prime examples of male physiology, only

 **MoltenLava** : oh, too bad for Bobby, then.

 **NiceAssIce** : hey! What are you implying? I'm a male! I'm a very manly male!

 **CannonballZ** : I thought you were a eunuch.

 **NiceAssIce** : Stop making up words, Sam

 _ **NiceAssIce**_ _has left the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 5:41 pm_

 **MoltenLava** : What an idiot

 _ **Golden_Drop_of_Sun**_ _has left the chat room. Sunday, Nov 9, 5:41 pm_

 **Crispy** : He was still here?

 **RogueBludger** : That strikes me as incredibly limiting, Kitty. I didn't know you were so narrow-minded.

 **RogueBludger** : What about bisexually curious females?

 **Shadowcat** : Awww, Rogue! You should have just said something! ;)

 **RogueBludger** : Don't wiggle your eyebrows at me, you freak.

 **RogueBludger** : "I'm asking for a friend!" says a voice in my head

 **Shadowcat** : It's ok, Rogue, I know your insults only come from deep love and affection. And sexual desire for my body

 **RogueBludger** : That's odd – usually my insults come from an inexplicable urge to bring you back to reality

 **RogueBludger** : And we both now that it's YOU who wants MY body

 **Shadowcat** : …. Just your boobs. Just aesthetically.

 **RogueBludger** : It's ok, everybody wants me because no one can have me ;)

 **RogueBludger** : ~Can't touch this~

 **Shadowcat** : EVERYBODY SHE JUST GROPED HER BOOBS AT ME

 **CannonballZ** : I saw that, lol

 **Crispy** : I missed it

 **Shadowcat** : I'm scarred!

 **RogueBludger** : You're jealous

 **TheRaginCajun** : _I'm_ jealous

* * *

Somewhere in New York, on a hill overlooking the city of Bayville, in a seemingly sedate mansion at the end of a winding drive surrounded by mature shrubbery, was a library in which a somewhat dramatically dressed girl suddenly burst from her seat at a solid oak table and let loose an incomprehensibly loud noise, making the other girl sitting directly across from her flinch and stand up, too.

"KITTY" Rogue yelled. "How did he get this address?"

"I don't know! It was supposed to be private!"

"You created the chat!"

"I know!

"So, how—"

"Well, it's online!"

"What?"

"It's hosted by a server, like everything else online!"

"What?!"

"Like reddit! You just need to be able to find it and know the passwords!"

"WHAT"

"It's not completely secure, I never, like, said it was! But it was, like, _very_ well hidden online!" Kitty gestured around the air above her laptop.

"But how did he know to access it? How did he find it online?!"

"I don't know, he must have, like, gotten the address and log-on directions!" Kitty sounded upset at the prospect and frowned fiercely. "I'm positive it's not a hacking job."

Rogue stared at Kitty. Kitty stared back.

Rogue narrowed her eyes and bit her lip a little. She glanced off to the side, head tipped.

"Oh….. shit." She muttered, much quieter than she had been speaking previously.

Kitty began again, "But who would ha—"

"No, ah, it's probably my fault." Rogue said with a casual sort of grimace.

Kitty stared at Rogue with frozen confusion on her face.

"What?" She said blankly.

"I may have…. Given the log-on details to….. Wanda…."

"What! You know how unreliable that girl is! She can't keep track of anything!"

"I know! But she wanted to be included and promised to keep it a secret from Pietro, which I naively assumed was the worst that could happen."

" _Well, obvi-ou-sly,_ " A voice in Rogue's head said bitingly, " _You neglected a few possibilities."_

* * *

 **Crispy** : Who is that?

 **Jubilicious** : How come I can hear Kitty and Rogue's voices from the third floor?

 **MoltenLava** : Idk, but I think it's gonna be good gossip.

 **TheRaginCajun** : What are they saying?

 **CannonballZ** : Don't tell him! Let's see what happens between Kitty and Rogue first

….

 **RogueBludger** : Swamp rat. How did you find this?

 **TheRaginCajun** : I have many skills, cherie

* * *

"Rogue, did you listen to anything I said at the meeting about this online chat? Like the parts about secrecy and stuff?"

"Yeah, 'course I did!" She said instantly, then gazed off to her left. "You were just talking for so long."

"It was only, like, ten minutes!"

"Ten minutes of my life that I will never get back."

"Maybe if you had paid attention, you wouldn't have, like, given out the details to random people, dooming us all!"

"I wasn't dooming us all—"

Amara spoke up – " Umm, I also like gave the details to Tabitha."

"DOES, LIKE, NO ONE LISTEN TO ME?"

"… maybe if you didn't say 'like' so much, you would be able to get your point across without losing our attention."

Kitty looked at Rogue for a moment, taken aback.

"Who told you to say that?"

Rogue cocked her head to the side. "I don't know what you mean."

"Which voice? Who was it? Was it the professor? Storm?"

"Kitty, please." Rogue rolled her eyes. "It was many people, all at once. It's a common thought."

Kitty continued staring at Rogue with her eyes narrowed.

"Just now, however, it happened to be Magneto."

"Don't give me advice from _Magneto_ , of all people!"

* * *

 **Jubilicious** : This has gotten boring now. I'm starving. I'm going down to dinner before certain people eat everything.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Are they still yelling?

 **Crispy** : It's more like a discussion. But Jubes has brought a dire possibility to our attention. We have to get down there.

 **CannonballZ** : Yeah. That's a real threat.

 **MoltenLava** : I'm not staying to get yelled at.

 _ **Jubilicious**_ _,_ _ **CannonballZ**_ _,_ _ **Crispy**_ _and_ _ **MoltenLava**_ _have left the chat room._

 _Sunday, Nov 9, 6:00 pm_

 **TheRaginCajun** : Oh no, the Ragin' Cajun gonna be all alone?

* * *

The door to the library slammed closed, leaving only Kitty and Rogue inside. They turned back to each other, then at the same time glanced down at the open computer screens between them.

"So like, what are we gonna do about this?"

"Well, I don't think it's a huge breach of security," Rogue said slowly.

"Not, like, technically," Kitty nodded.

"I don't know what the Ragin' Cajun's game is," Rogue leaned slightly over the table, toward Kitty, " _But_ since this is _your_ project, you could just tell everyone that it's been expanded to include _all_ mutants of the area. Like a bonding thing."

"Yeahhh, oh, yeah, the professor will like that," Kitty nodded enthusiastically, also leaning over the table at this point, "And, then, everyone will know, or like should know, it's not, like, an X-men _secure_ thing, and it won't be anyone's fault if the log-on details have gotten out."

"Exactly,"

"And you know, this whole project was experimental to begin with, anyway,"

"Uh huh,"

"We can't be expected to control every little thing about it!"

"It's taken on a life of it's own, as most cultural and social things do!"

"Right," Kitty looked happier.

"Now, we had better get down there before all the food is gone, or worse one of those idiots that was here says something before we can, you know—"

"Tell them about the true purpose of the online chat, and—"

"Mutant bonding, open dialogue with—"

"Right, exactly."

Both girls quickly closed their laptops and gathered up their stuff. They dashed back to their room to drop it off before basically running to dinner.

Before reaching the dining room, however, Kitty spoke up,

"'TheRaginCajun' was Gambit, though, wasn't it?" She said, looking sideways at Rogue.

"Yeah, that's-that's who—"

"He's been around a lot," Kitty stated, still examining Rogue.

 _Oh, more than you know_ , Rogue thought to herself. And the voices. Out loud, she just said, "Yeah, Let's talk about that _after_ dinner, ok?"

"Ok," Kitty agreed, still sharp-eyed.

The two opened the double doors into the dining room and let their private conversation naturally drown in the outpouring of sound from inside the room.


	2. Chapter 2

The man known as Gambit closed the door of his apartment behind him, making sure to flick the deadbolt above the doorknob into place, slide the chain guard, and lock the additional deadbolt above the chain. He tested the door critically, almost compulsively. Nothing made him feel more secure than a false sense of security.

He walked across his apartment, which was carefully devoid of truly personal items, yet at the same time somewhat cluttered and messy. It had a certain l'air de panache common to many bachelors' living quarters, a mixture of stale sweat, cologne and something, somewhere, rotting. Gambit stood amongst his possessions and inhaled the sweet scent of home lovingly, perhaps trying to discern exactly what or where the rotting smell came from. He inhaled again before mentally shrugging and going back to his original objective. His focus quickly shifted to a small, sleek black laptop sitting on a table in front of a nice manly pair of plaid curtains, drawn tightly over a window first obscured by Venetian blinds. Privacy was everything, Gambit knew, because essentially it was an illusion.

He took off his leather trench coat and poured himself some bourbon, sat down at the table in the only uncovered chair available and opened his laptop. He went to an obscure website, apparently completely devoted to Lepidoptera. He moved his mouse to an image of an especially alarming moth, larger than the human hand it perched on. He clicked on the photo, labeled _Attacus atlas_ in blue underneath, and when the enlarged photo popped up on the screen, carefully hovered his mouse over the upper tip of the left wing. His mouse switched from being a regular cursor to the excited pointy finger. He clicked. The screen of Lepidoptera dissolved and instead a box popped up asking for his screen name and password.

He quickly logged himself in and entered an active chat room.

* * *

 ** _TheRaginCajun_** _has joined the conversation along with 7 active and 8 idle. Tuesday, November 12, 6:50 pm_

 **TheJamies** : Guys, we should call this chat the X-Chat.

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : No that sounds like it's a chat that no longer exists. Like it's died, or something.

 **Jubilicious** : Like an ex-boyfriend

 **TheJamies** : We call the mansion the X-Mansion

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Only certain people do that

 **Crispy** : The x-mansion has already BEEN an ex-mansion

 **Jubilicious** : That's true, but this chat has never been an ex-chat

 **Shadowcat** : You know, guys, I wrote the program and set up the hosting domains so if anyone has naming rights, it's me.

 **Crispy** : This chat could easily become an X-chat, just by mutating

 **CannonballZ** : And "to mutate" is just another word to describe change!

 **Crispy** : Hmm, normal conversation mutates all the time!

 **CannonballZ** : Aaaaand, because it's a chat being by mutants, for mutants, it's already all mutated. It's a mutant chat.

 **Crispy** : You know what this means?

 **CannonballZ** : This here chat is one super-X-chat!

* * *

This conversation had nothing that really interested Gambit. As in people, it was missing the people he was actually interested in. Namely, the _person_.

He scrolled down the list of people online until his eyes snagged on one particular screen name. There was only one person he knew who would chose that handle.

He sent a private message request.

* * *

 **TheRaginCajun** : There's only one man of steel I know

 **theRealManofSteel** : I know only one RaginCajun.

 **theRealManofSteel** : It's good to hear from you

 **TheRaginCajun** : Same, mon amie, how long's it been?

 **theRealManofSteel** : Oh too long. Way too long. Maybe five days?

 **TheRaginCajun** : I'm surprised you remember me, homme

 **theRealManofSteel** : Don't worry, I could never forget you. When I try to fall asleep, sometimes I can still feel my ears ringing from that time you exploded John's lighter.

 **TheRaginCajun** : What you been up to?

 **theRealManofSteel** : I signed on for a week's worth of work down at the docks, so I am just hanging around. I' m trying to save up some money.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Where are you staying?

 **theRealManofSteel** : Near the docks, there's a boarding house with rooms you can rent.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Homme, don't spend your money on that! Come stay with me, I got an apartment now in Bayville

 **theRealManofSteel** : I don't know if I can afford to pay you rent

 **TheRaginCajun** : Don't worry about it, you can stay for free! I have a nice comfy couch.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Haha, ok then I will take you up on that offer

 **TheRaginCajun** : Great! I'll send you the address.

 **theRealManofSteel** : It would only be for another week

 **TheRaginCajun** : Stay as long as you need to, mon amie. I'll text you the address, same phone number?

 **theRealManofSteel** : Yes

 **TheRaginCajun** : Ok, mine's different now

 **TheRaginCajun** : You know, speaking of John boy, you haven't heard anything from him, have you?

 **theRealManofSteel** : Yesterday I was passing a television and it was showing the news. Something about a ten alarm fire. For some reason, it made me think of John.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Hmm, yes. For some reason, a ten-alarm fire would make me think of John too. I've been trying to keep an eye out for him.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Actually homme, how did you find out about this chat?

 **theRealManofSteel** : A couple days ago, I got a call from that Professor Xavier. He said that Magneto had given him my phone number and that I was welcome to visit the mansion anytime. Very different from dealing with Magneto. He seemed aware that I was torn between staying here and doing manual labor and going back to Russia, which I found a little strange at first.

 **TheRaginCajun** : He offered you a place to stay?

 **theRealManofSteel** : Also work.

 **theRealManofSteel** : He knew a lot about my life. Then he said I didn't have to make any decisions right then, and gave me the information about this website and chat room, so I could keep in touch no matter what I decide.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Well, that's real nice of him

 **theRealManofSteel** : I thought so. How did you get the information?

 **TheRaginCajun** : Oh, you know. I was visiting the Brotherhood house, thinking maybe John-boy would be around. I found the directions to get to this website and make a screen name all written out, nicely, on a sheet of paper.

 **theRealManofSteel** : John wasn't there?

 **TheRaginCajun** : No. One whole side of the house was scorched pretty bad, though

 **TheRaginCajun** : So maybe he'll be back.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Was anyone aware of your visit?

 **theRealManofSteel** : Actually, don't bother answering that question. Did you leave some way for John to get in touch if he does turn up there?

 **TheRaginCajun** : No, it was more a reconnaissance then chitchatting type of visit. That house has gotten ten times more decrepit.

 **theRealManofSteel** : I am not surprised.

 **theRealManofSteel** : But you just decided to follow the directions and make a screen name without even knowing exactly what it was meant for?

 **TheRaginCajun** : They were written out real detailed. Like, super detailed. It just made so much sense, it was so simple, I couldn't _not_ follow them.

 **theRealManofSteel** : I was unaware the Brotherhood was so incompetent.

 **TheRaginCajun** : I don't think these directions were meant for the Brotherhood exactly, they seemed just meant for one person. But in all fairness, they are pretty damn incompetent.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Who were they for?

 **TheRaginCajun** : Wanda

 **theRealManofSteel** : Professor Xavier didn't invite the rest of them?

 **TheRaginCajun** : It wasn't from the prof.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Oh?

 **TheRaginCajun** : Yeah.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Who was it from?

 **TheRaginCajun** : …

 **theRealManofSteel** : Ah-ha! The truth emerges.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Don't know what you're talking about

 **theRealManofSteel** : Am I to take it, then, that you are still watching her, even though you are no longer being paid to?

 **TheRaginCajun** : Hey homme, I was never exactly paid to watch _her_. I was paid to watch all of them. She was just more interesting.

 **theRealManofSteel** : This is the same girl you kidnapped?

 **TheRaginCajun** : It's not kidnapping when they decide to stay!

 **theRealManofSteel** : Ok. Sure. That makes a lot of sense.

 **theRealManofSteel** : From a kidnapper's point of view.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Why the sass, homme? Where's the love?

 **theRealManofSteel** : You're not planning on kidnapping her again, are you? I feel like I should ask before moving in with you.

 **TheRaginCajun** : No, but I make no promises about either of us independently choosing to travel, together, in the same direction, in the future.

 **theRealManofSteel** : That makes no sense. I now have serious misgivings about living with you.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Hey, no one knows what the future may hold, I'm just keeping all possibilities open!

 **theRealManofSteel** : On that note, I have to get back to the boarding house. I'm using a computer at the public library right now.

 **TheRaginCajun** : Wait, the public library? My apartment is really close!

 **theRealManofSteel** : How close?

 **TheRaginCajun** : Have you already paid for tonight at the boarding house?!

 **theRealManofSteel** : I have not….

 **TheRaginCajun** : Sleepover party!

 **theRealManofSteel** : I wake up before dawn. I am planning on going to sleep early, since I have to be at the docks early.

 **TheRaginCajun** : That's fine! I won't bother you, you won't bother me! It'll be fun!

 **TheRaginCajun** : And free! You'll be saving money!

 **theRealManofSteel** : Alright. I may regret this.

 **TheRaginCajun** : I'll make you eat those words.

 **theRealManofSteel** : I'm coming over. I got the text with your address.

 **TheRaginCajun** : You know how to get to it from the library?

 **theRealManofSteel** : I think so. I go down Elleridge St, then right on Marsh?

 **TheRaginCajun** : Yup, then it's the second building from that corner.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Ok. I'm coming now.

 **TheRaginCajun** : YAS! PARTY

 **theRealManofSteel** : NO! No party. Nice quiet evening. Sleepy evening.

 **TheRaginCajun** : I thought you said you were leaving now.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Oh before I forget

 **theRealManofSteel** : When I was making this screen name I almost typed in 'TheRealManofSteal' instead of 'steel.' Then I thought, "No, that would be Remy."

 **TheRaginCajun** : Hahaha. I like it

 **TheRaginCajun** : Or maybe - the real man of stealth. Actually that doesn't sound as cool.

 **theRealManofSteel** : No, that sounds stupid.

 **theRealManofSteel** : Ok, I'm leaving for real now. Bye

 **TheRaginCajun** : See ya soon

 _ **theRealManofSteel**_ _has left the chat._

* * *

Gambit switched back over to the main conversation, just to see if anyone interesting had logged on. More people were online but not anyone interesting.

 _Oh well,_ he thought, looking around his apartment. Maybe Piotr would be able to help him find the source of the smell.

The couch was actually a pull-out couch. He was pretty lucky, as far as apartments went - he even had extra rooms. There were two real bedrooms and then a fairly smallish room that looked like it had a closet but actually it was access to the roof. Most of the rooms were empty except the living room, kitchen, and a bedroom.

Gambit wondered if he should clean a little. Nah, they'd been exposed to worse.

Gambit glanced over the conversation online before logging out.

* * *

 **NiceAssIce** : BoomBoom, BoomBoom, I want you in my room

 **NiceAssIce** : We can spend the night together

 **NiceAssIce** : From now until forever

 **NiceAssIce** : I wanna go boom boom!

 **NiceAssIce** : Let's spend the night together, together in my room!

 **BoomBoom** : Never, Bobby.

 **BoomBoom** : Never.

 **Jubilicious:** Great, now that song is stuck in my head.

 **BoomBoom** : It is a great song, right?

 **BlueNFuzzy** : I don't know about that

 **Jubilicious** : um…

 **BoomBoom** : Kurt, your screen name sucks.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Shut up. I was in a rush.

 **BoomBoom** : It should be wild blue yonder boy

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : That's too long

 **Jubilicious** : It's also too stupid

 **BlueNFuzzy** : I don't see myself that way, Tabitha. I'm a very serious young man.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : besides, yours is just what you're called anyway

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Should you really be insulting mine when yours is subpar in its own way?

 **BoomBoom** : What do you mean?!

 **BoomBoom** : It's perfect! It describes exactly who I am!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : That's… actually a great point, Tabitha

 **BoomBoom** : Don't sound so surprised, toilet paper!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : How could I have sounded surprised, this is an online chat!

 **BoomBoom** : I know what you think about me!

 **BoomBoom** : in the shower! (lol)

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Tabitha, I have never thought about you in the shower except for that one time you decided to burst in on the boys' shower after a DR session, when we were both, suddenly, in a shower. Along with Sam, Ray and Bobby.

 **CannonballZ** : Yeah, and I still really resent that, Tabby!

 **Crispy** : Same!

 **NiceAssIce** : I wasn't too bothered.

 **Crispy** : Bullshit. You iced everything instantly!

 **BlueNFuzzy** : I've never been more thankful that I can just teleport up to my room after DR sessions.

 **CannonballZ** : We spent the next hour trying to recover from hypothermia!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Yeah, that was really bad

 **Jubilicious** : lolololol

 **Crispy** : Thanks for that, Iceprick.

* * *

Hours later that evening:

 _ **BeamMeUpScotty**_ _and_ _ **Jubilicious**_ _have left the chat._

 _ **BoomBoom**_ _,_ _ **BlueNFuzzy**_ _,_ _ **TheJamies**_ _, and_ _ **MissPopular**_ _have left the chat._

 _ **Shadowcat**_ _,_ _ **RogueBludger**_ _, and_ _ **Crispy**_ _have left the chat._

 _ **CannonballZ**_ _has left the chat._

 _ **MoltenLava**_ _has left the chat._

 _3 active, 0 idle. Wednesday, November 13, 12:41 am_

 **NiceAssIce** : Mwah ha ha ha haha

 **NiceAssIce** : It's just us now

 **NiceAssIce** : Are the preparations in place?

 **Golden_Drop_of_Sun** : Affirmative

 **NiceAssIce** : Good *rubs hands together manically*

 **Golden_Drop_of_Sun** : I think you mean man _i_ acally, not manically.

* * *

 _Thursday, November 14_

Something horrible had happened to Kitty today. Rogue could tell. She really didn't want to open the floodgates of melodrama just yet, though, so hadn't asked. She pretended to be really engrossed in the textbook of the one college extension course the professor had convinced her to take while Kitty slammed her items around on the table before finally opening her laptop and becoming inert for a few minutes.

Kitty suddenly shrieked, making Rogue jump in the seat across from her. She watched Kitty stand up and run towards the door, disappearing into the floor at the same time. A dramatic scream echoed from somewhere below. It could have been a battle cry.

Rogue leaned to her right to peer through a window.

A mess of adolescent boys spilled onto the lawn below her, chased by the girl who had once been Kitty, now called Vengeance.

The boys tried in vain to defend themselves. Bobby tried icing her, which didn't work because she just phased, then he tried picking up a racket and throwing it at her, which she caught and threw back, hitting him in the face and somehow taking out his feet at the same time. Once he was knocked down, she took up the racket again, hitting him with it while he tried to grab it.

From inside the kitchen, Logan glanced up from his reading material to see Drake trying to grab the racket away from Pryde only to have it phase through his hands and smack him in the head again. Logan shook his head, taking note of Drake's tendency to overestimate his own abilities and underestimate other's. Then he gazed off into space, a slightly mad twist to his lips, imagining a future danger room session that would take Drake down a peg, if Pryde didn't do it herself. Actually, Logan realized, he should capitalize on Pryde's anger and set the kids against each other in the next session. It had to be soon though; teenage girls were so damn volatile.

From another window Hank McCoy also spotted the teenagers. _Ah, Hubris_ , he thought, _the fall of man_. Then he wondered if someone should be stopping Kitty from bashing Bobby over the head like that. _Hmm_. If he waited long enough, someone else would get to it. He popped another Twinkie™ in his mouth. And turned away from the scene out the window.

Bobby started screaming as he was phased into the ground up to his waist and abandoned that way. Dr. McCoy, his back to the window now, increased the volume of some nice soothing classical music.

Meanwhile, Rouge was now on the telephone with Wanda.

"I wrote all the directions out for you more than a week ago! You didn't understand them!?"

" _I did! I made a screen name and everything! Now the stupid website won't let me log on!"_

"Are you sure you're—"

" _I've done everything! Just get the hyper girl with the squeaky voice to help me!"_

"She's already explained it all to you once,"

" _I don't want to talk to_ her again _, I want you to talk to her for me!"_

"What—"

" _I can't understand anything she says on the phone, as soon as she starts talking it's like my ears shut down to save whatever ability of comprehension I have left."_

Rogue looked out the window to see Kitty attacking the other boy with the racket, Bobby still phased into the ground. She said into the phone, "I can't right now, she's beating up someone with a racket."

" _Hmm… an activity I approve of."_ Wanda seemed to mutter to herself.

Rogue opened her window and held the phone out for a second before returning it to her face. "Hear that?"

" _Who's screaming?"_

"Bobby Drake,"

" _Sounds fun over there,"_

"Yeah, but with our luck someone will intervene eventually." Rogue sighed.

' _True,"_

"… Try hexing the computer,"

"… _Will that actually – whoa, it worked! I'm online, yes!"_

"Alright," Rogue heard the phone clatter and the sound of Wanda moving a chair.

" _Hey, Rogue, go online!"_

"Ugh, but I was reading something,"

" _Suck it up, I don't know any of these other losers, nor do I want to."_

"… Alright… I guess."

" _I give you thirty seconds to get online."_

Rogue snorted, "Well, I'm not gonna make it then,"

" _Fine, one minute,"_

"I'm turning on my computer….. now."

" _Why wasn't it on_ already _?"_

"I wasn't _using_ it,"

" _So? I don't use mine all the time, but it's always on."_

"Wanda, that's bad for the computer."

" _I'll just get a new one."_

"What?! How?"

" _I didn't tell you? My father decided it's better to just pay me off instead of actually dealing with me when I get that urge to hunt him down and kill him like a dog."_

"When did that happen?"

" _Um…This weekend."_

"Oh." Rogue said, mildly impressed. "Ok, I'm logging on."

" _Good."_

"What's your screen name?" Rogue asked, looking at the list of people online.

" _My screen name is cause for alarm."_

"….how so?"

" _No, Rogue, it's cause_ for _alarm"_

"What?...Ahhh, never mind. I see it. Haha."

Rogue looked out the window again, at the lawn where Kitty was still trying to beat up Bobby. It vaguely surprised her that no one had come to his rescue yet. He had changed into his ice form, as a last measure of defense.

She mildly wondered what he had done, yet at the same time, didn't really care.

* * *

 **Jubilicious** : Ok, so I got 5 from Ray and 1 dollar from Jaimie that Kitty breaks something

 **CannonballZ** : I don't think Kitty's gonna actually break some part of Roberto's body, he's all super-strength right now.

 **Crispy** : I have faith in Kitty. She will find a way.

 **McWolfy** : I think Bobby's gonna get the worst of it

 **BlueNFuzzy** : I'm gonna put 10 on Kitty refusing to un-phase Bobby later

 **MoltenLava** : I don't think Roberto's gonna be seriously injured. At least, not before someone shows up to stop the fight

 **Jubilicious** : Any bets on how long until then?

 **Crispy** : Stop killing my buzz, Amara

 **McWolfy** : I'm gonna bet a solid seven and a half minutes.

 **Jubilicious** : 7.5 on the dot?

 **Crispy** : I want to see a fight to the death!

 **CannonballZ** : it's probably not gonna last that long, Ray

 **RogueBludger** : I dunno, Kitty can be pretty inventive when the occasion calls

 **Cause4Alarm** : How intense is this fight? Is it worth a trip over there? Or will it be over by the time I arrive

 **McWolfy** : I don't know, it's pretty one-sided.

 **RogueBludger** : Hard to say, it's only a matter of time before the authorities notice

 **Crispy** : But very entertaining!

 **Jubilicious** : Who is Cause4Alarm?

 **TheJaimies** : We should be filming this for America's Funniest Home Videos!

 **Cause4Alarm** : Yes! Film it! Then I can watch it later

 **RogueBludger** : I support filming for entertainment purposes but I think submitting it to AFV would be a severe breach of security, Jaimie

 **Jubilicious** : Who IS Cause4Alarm?

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Don't worry, everybody! Tabitha's already filming from a second story window

 **Cause4Alarm** : Excellent

 **Crispy** : Oh good. I have a feeling I'll want to watch this several times

 **Cause4Alarm** : Same

 **Jubilicious** : Alright, WHO IS Cause4Alarm?

 **CannonballZ** : Aren't we all cause for alarm, Firecracker?

 **RogueBludger** : Firecracker seems really alarmed

 **BlueNFuzzy** : There is no cause for alarm, Firecracker

 **Jubilicious** : STOP IT!

 **Cause4Alarm** : Chill out, Firecracker

 **Jubilicious** : WHO ARE YOU

 **TheJaimies** : Whoa, did everyone see Kitty throw that chair!

 **Crispy** : IT'S A STEEL CHAIR

 **Crispy** : SHE'S DOING A STEEL CHAIR MOVE

 **Jubilicious** : Goddamnit I missed it

 **BlueNFuzzy** : They're wrestling for the chair

 **MoltenLava** : JUBES NEW BET! Roberto gets the chair but Kitty wins the fight!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : What fight?

 **TheJaimies** :…. cricket…..

 **Jubilicious** : JAIMIE, JUST DON'T ANSWER HIM!

 **BlueNFuzzy** : uh oh, MissPopolar spotted

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Popular*

 **RogueBludger** : it's the popo, lol

 **Jubilicious** : but where's her trusty sidekick?

 **Cause4Alarm** : HA! I know exactly who that is!

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Excuse me?

 **Jubilicious** : I mean, dashing and handsome ally of justice.

 **CannonballZ** : Jubes, just stop. Stop now.

* * *

Outside, Jean Grey glided towards the action, heroically and stoically, with her red hair fanning out behind her. She telekinetically ripped away the steel chair and got a hold on Roberto as he turned to run away. Then, Kitty jumped up to grab the steel chair still hovering above them and somehow phased it out of Jean's mental grasp.

" _Huh?_ " went Jean's brain.

She brought the chair down on Roberto's back in WWE Monday Night's Raw move, effectively slamming Roberto into the ground and out of Jean's grasp. Someone cheered out a window.

"Kitty! Stop!" Jean yelled, quickly levitating her away from Roberto, who took advantage of the attention on Kitty to somehow leap five feet in the air in an effort to get away,

"Ugh, like shut up, Jean!" Kitty spat out and then hurled the steel chair at her, phasing herself out of Jean's grasp. Surprisingly, Kitty did not fall to the ground but instead kept on standing in the air. This distracted Kitty for perhaps a millisecond but then she just started running after Roberto, apparently _on_ or _through_ air.

Meanwhile back in the mansion, Kurt said, "Wow, it looks like she's running on air… Is Jean helping her do that?"

"I doubt it, considering she just got a face full of steel chair," Sam replied.

* * *

 **Cause4Alarm** : What's happening now?

 **RogueBludger** : I think Kitty just broke MissPopular's nose!

 **Jubilicious** : Holy shit! Kitty broke something! I repeat, Kitty Broke Something!

 **Crispy** : YES, haha, suckers! Gimme your money!

 **TheJaimies** : Hey, I win too!

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Oh here comes Scott

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Oh damn and Storm

 **Crispy** : Well, kids, it was fun while it lasted

* * *

Outside, thunder crashed and lightning struck the ground in front of Roberto. He stumbled down in front of Kitty, who dove at him, phasing him into the ground as she'd done to Bobby, a short ways away. Bobby was craning around, trying to see what was going on. He'd been lodged in the ground facing away from the action.

"Enough!" Ororo said imperiously. "What is the cause of this?" She questioned Kitty.

Kitty screamed something inarticulate, pointing at Bobby and Roberto. Or, as they had dubbed themselves, The Roberts/Team Roberto/Robbies. There had been an inordinate amount of squabbling between the two people uniting behind a shared first name, about how exactly they should refer to themselves. It would have been more effective to brand themselves Team-Of-Two-People-With-The-Same-Name. Also, more anonymous. Perhaps less easy for a certain computer whiz to find the private chats online.

Scott helped Jean up from the ground, where she had been hunched, cradling her nose.

"Ew, I mean, um, let's get you to Hank," He said.

Jean mumbled something and spit blood onto the grass.

Hank had continued to turn up his music periodically and consume Twinkies.

Storm still tried to hold a withering gaze on the kids below her, "Kitty, you can't continue on in this way—"

"Ok, kids," Logan suddenly popped up out of nowhere and interrupted, "We can continue this in one of two places. The danger room… or… the danger room."

"Wait, Logan—" Storm tried to intervene.

"I PICK THE DANGER ROOM," Kitty shouted over Storm.

"Excellent choice, Pryde." Logan said.

"I said, WAIT A SECOND!" More thunder rocked the mansion.

* * *

The Next Day:

Bobby and Roberto were forced to formally apologize to Kitty and also begin atonement. Strangely, most people still didn't know exactly what had been done to Kitty. Kitty didn't want to talk about it and the people who did know suddenly didn't want to incur Kitty's wrath. There may or may not have been a running bet about it.

Bobby seemed to harbor some confusion about his punishment, mostly where it ended and Kitty's thirst for revenge began. He thought that the punishment he was assigned by the adults of the mansion automatically doubled as revenge on Kitty's behalf. That was not at all what Kitty thought, and Kitty could be quite catty.

* * *

 **NiceAssIce** : Oh so it's the Anger room now?

 **NiceAssIce** : Where all the angry people go, to beat up people who have already apologized?

 **BeamMeUpScotty** : Bobby brings up a great point. I think we should all think about if the punishment matches the deed.

 **Shadowcat** : I am inclined to think not.

 **Crispy** : Bobby, you have to pay. You have to pay right from the very beginning of the thought, the very seed your actions first bloomed from.

 **MoltenLava** : Which we still don't know very much about….

 **NiceAssIce** : Fine! Then just say I'm also being punished in the danger room, or as it is now called, the Anger Room.

 **BlueNFuzzy** : More like the panic room, for _certain people_

 **MissPopular** : it's not called the panic room!

 **BlueNFuzzy** : sometimes it's called the frustration station

 **TheJamies** : the grounds _for_ violence

 **RogueBludger** : More like the retaliation station

 **BlueNFuzzy** : the chamber of fury, lol

 **RogueBludger** : A den of retribution!

 **BlueNFuzzy** : Mwah ha ha hahaha

 **MissPopular** : Ignore them, Bobby

* * *

"Ignore… us at… your own….. peril," Kurt muttered as he typed.

 _At least here's one young man who hasn't become a complete disappointment to humanity_ , Rogue thought as she leaned back in her chair next to Kurt.

Apparently, Bobbie and Roberto had gotten into a deep discussion on one occasion and as a result began planning something, the beginning stages of which depended on stealing girls' clothing. Namely, bras. Then, as the girls were forced to go around with no bras, Bobby and Roberto could unobtrusively examine them to see if there was any visible difference in the appearance of their bodies.

It was just an unfortunate hitch in their plan that the person they decided to start with had designated bras for certain days and events, and when she couldn't find the one she had planned on wearing, had been forced to change her outfit completely and ended up being uncomfortable and feeling out of place all day. Horrible things had happened to her that day, which she probably _would_ have been able to handle moderately well, if she had been wearing exactly what she had expected to.

First, she had been late to Chem lab first thing in the morning, which she would have remembered about if she had been wearing what she planned to wear. Also she had been inappropriately dressed for Chem lab, and had been wearing open-toed shoes, which wouldn't have happened if she had been wearing what she planned to wear. So she had gotten a reprimand and extra work. In her next class she realized she had forgotten her homework on her desk, where she had left it while rushing to come up with another outfit. At lunch she had gotten milk all over her shirt, a shirt she had been forced to wear because it was the only shirt dark enough to look okay over the bra she had ben forced to wear. Things snow-balled from there and culminated in her last class of the day, where she learned about the many kinds of sexual harassment and micro-aggressions forced on women in all stages of childhood and adolescence that essentially trained them for a life in which the traits of their bodies are used against them. The discussion opened with bra snapping and an anecdote about a high school boy stealing girls' bras. For some reason this resonated very deeply with Kitty.

For the next fifty minutes she paid acute attention in a class she almost always zoned out for. The result was a galvanized, politically active and self-aware Kitty.

"Can you believe how the female body is taken advantage of?!" Kitty had demanded of Rogue on the way back to the mansion.

"Oh yeah." She had replied seriously. "That's why I never wear bras. Besides, knowing my luck, someone would probably steal them."

And for the second time that day Kitty was forcibly struck by something someone else said and how it applied to her own life.

* * *

Author's Note:

Songs harmed in the making of this chapter, "BoomBoomBoomBoom I want you in my room" by the VengaBoys

 **Also, why does it let me type things in bold if it's not going to make them bold once I publish? What kind of strange torture is that?**

 **Edit: So, apparently things are in bold - I'm just the only one who can't see it...?**

 **Edit 2:** Thank you for all the reviews! And I'm sorry for the sporadic updates, it's difficult making time in my fabulously busy and enviable celebrity lifestyle.

 **Edit 3:** I am completely kidding about that last part. I am not a celebrity, nor do I have the lifestyle of one. One luxury I do enjoy, however, is the completely false sense of human interaction I get when one of you reviews, follows, or favorites my writing. Thanks.

 _ **See you space cowboy. . .**_


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